late bloomer.

i get a lot of questions as to the significance of the ring i wear on the middle finger of my right hand. well, firstly, i got it from kyle anne metals at etsy.com. it was custom made for me, and only cost $18, but it’s one of my favorite possessions. here’s a picture:

one of the reasons this Blooming Birch Ring in Pink caught my eye was the seller’s description:  “This ring reminds me of a birch branch in springtime, getting ready to blossom.”

i think of myself as a late bloomer. at the ripe young age of 29, i feel that i have finally begun to come into my own. i’ve spent a great deal of my life (in fact, my entire 20s!) being introspective and trying to figure out exactly who i am and what it is i want to do with my life. i’ve met many wonderful people, whom i admire greatly. hard laborers; talented musicians; amazing teachers; lovely & patient mothers; determined career-minded people; awe-inspiring people from what my dad calls the “school of hard knocks”… all of these friends, acquaintances, family members, even a few that i’ve met only once, have provided me with a wealth of knowledge about the world around me, which has allowed me to look within myself and learn.

i’ve spent so much time wanting to be certain things: the perfect wife/daughter/sister/niece/grandchild/cousin/aunt/dog owner/what have you, a straight-A student, a musician and artist, a well-educated know-it-all, physically fit, beautiful on the inside and out, talented writer, great cook, well-spoken, well-read, very ethical and work-minded… you name it.

it’s taken me more time than some, and a lot less time than others to realize that i can be anything i put my mind to, but that the things that matter most are within me. it’s always been a struggle for me to keep my self-esteem from the gutter, but the older i get, the easier it is to say the following:

i am…

kind, loyal, honest, studious, sort of pretty, very loved, funny, talented musically and artistically, observant, reasonable, a loving wife/daughter/sister/niece/aunt/etc, a good cook/baker, well-read, an observer, a thinker, lucky enough to have a large and amazing family…

there are many other things that i am, and many more that i still strive to be. i’m constantly seeking ways to better myself, and chastising myself for being judgmental or bitter on those occasions on which we all are apt to behave this way.

but for now, i am happy with me.

this ring that i wear is a daily reminder of that. the little about-t0-blossom bud on a tiny branch. i know that the older i get, the more experience i have, the more i will blossom and grow.

and that is one of the most beautiful things about life.  🙂

download this:  “i & love & you” by the avett brothers

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