hindsight is 20/20

God, that’s such a cliche’.  

I was just doing some cleaning of the house, and I came across my journal, which I had been looking for. Ever since blogging came about, I’ve neglected writing in journals as often as I should, and that makes me sad, because it is so much fun to go back to my old journals and read about what was going on in my life. I’m even thinking of using a specific one to write a book based on my dating experiences. (KT, remind me that I want to talk to you about that–I totes think we should write a comedic book together on our crazy dating stories.)  

Anyway, I was looking through this journal, and I came across this excerpt, written on 8 October, 2008:

“I was just watching Ugly Betty on DVD, and Betty was talking about how she’d always wanted to be a writer, and she’d enrolled in a creative writing class. It reminded me of how much I used to love to write. A couple of weeks ago, Dede even asked me what ever happened to the ‘novel’ I was writing so long ago. I just dismissed it as a silly childhood notion, and said I hadn’t written in years. She looked sort of sad when I said that. When I got to thinking about it, I realized that it’s been a good TEN years since I’ve written. And I really think the reason is based on my freshman year of college. My professor told me my writing was incompetent. The shittiest part of that is that my major then was journalism. I know that I was upset about it, but now I’m thinking it threw me for a much, much bigger loop than I originally thought. I HAVEN’T WRITTEN ANYTHING IN TEN YEARS!!! That’s huge! For the first 18 years of my life, I wrote. and wrote and wrote and wrote. Teachers, family members, friends, all told me how amazing my writing was, and that I had the best imagination. And I let one person that I didn’t even like or even respect ruin that for me. Wow.  So now I really want to write. Have for a while. But the problem is that I don’t know how to start anymore. I always think, ‘hmm, I could write a semi-autobiographical story about my experiences with boys’–like an advice book for young girls or something. But then I think about certain aspects that I would definitely not want my family reading about. I dunno. I wish I could get inspired……I think maybe I’ll try to do a little reminiscing and write some things that have happened in the past. Then maybe I’ll be inspired by an event or a random thought. Hmmm…we shall see…”

And then there’s the next entry, written on 22 October, where I mention an event that could very well be the perfect beginning to a story. I’m not going to go into it here, because I think it’s the perfect opening sentence, and I don’t want to give it away.  😉  

I just wrote in my journal today. I wrote about how I want to be a writer. Well, I am a writer in the sense that I write. But I want others to think of me as a writer too. I’d love to be published. That’d be so amazing. And being a freelance writer for magazine articles would be awesome too. aaaaaaanyway, I’m getting way way ahead of myself. I think I’ve decided to minor in creative writing. That was my mom’s influence. She’s spent the last ten years telling me that she misses my writing, and she mentioned one day while we were talking about school that she’d love to see me pursue my writing. Obviously, she loves my writing more than my art. 😉  JK, Mom. 

At any rate, I’m really proud of myself for what I wrote in that October 8th journal entry. The fact that I can look back and say that I let someone that I didn’t even respect deeply effect me, makes me feel sort of smart. lol.  But that’s why the title of this blog is what it is.  

download this:  “Try a Little Tenderness” by Otis Redding. Just click & it’ll take you directly to the song, where you will click “play” and enjoy immensely.   

today’s favorite etsy item:  Since it’s a rainy, stormy, icky day, I thought I’d go with this.  Cloud Number 16 by lgFrog.

I'm just a little black rain cloud, hovering over the honey tree. I'm only a little black rain cloud, pay no attention to little me.

I'm just a little black rain cloud, hovering over the honey tree. I'm only a little black rain cloud, pay no attention to little me.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s